LizzieMaine
Bartender
- Messages
- 35,411
- Location
- Where The Tourists Meet The Sea
("Um," mumbles Alice, squirming in her downtown clothes. "Do you know," frowns Magistrate Solomon, "why I asked you to come here today?" "Ummmmm," repeats Alice, wringing the handle of her purse. "I was in your neighborhood the other afternoon," continues the Magistrate, selecting a cigarette from a lacquer box on his desk. He offers the box to Alice, who nervously demurs. He lights up, takes a puff, and rests the cigarette on a streamlined ashtray. "I heard something that -- concerns me." "Oh," stumbles Alice, examining the floor tiles. "This matter with Mr. Krause," continues the Magistrate. "Now, your personal affairs are of course your own concern, but when the welfare of a child is..." "Um," repeats Alice, "t'is ain' got nut'n'a do wit' Willie. It's 'caus'a my frien' Sal." "Oh?" replies the Magistrate, his eyebrow raised. "I mean, it ain' like Sal knows about it a' nut'n," stammers Alice. "I was try'na keep it secret." "I'm sorry," exhales the Magistrate, taking off his glasses and applying pressure to his forehead. "This -- ah -- secret caused your husband to go on -- ah -- a rampage, I believe is what I heard? And to behave as a -- wild man? And your friend Sal? Who is he?" "No, no," stutters Alice. "He ain'a he Sal, she's a she Sal. Sally Petrauskas, lives upstaiehs. You met'eh at t' wedd'n." "Oh yes," nods the Magistrate. "The loud one with the glasses, I believe." He replaces his spectacles and deepens his frown. "Am I to understand from all this that Mrs. Petrauskas and Mr. Krause are..." "NO! NO! NO!" yelps Alice. "T'ey AIN'T. I mean, 'ney get alawng pretty good, see, Siddy is one'a ya real quiet guys, an' Sal, well... Anyways, it ain' nut'n like ya sayin', no no no." "Ah," repeats the Magistrate. "Suppose you start at the beginning." "Well," sighs Alice, "I met Sal when she stawrted woikin' at West'en Electric. See, I knew who she *was*, 'cause I know -- knew - um, you know -- 'eh brot'eh. T'at's Mickey Sweeney, an', um, well, he ain' nobody. F'gettabout'im. Anyways, we got to be good frien's, Sal an' me, I mean, Mickey ain' got no friens, an' well, skip ahead, an' well, Sal's hadda rough line'a luck lately. Her lit'l goil got sick, hadda opehration, an' now she can't heeh outa one eeh. An'neh husban's tryin'a be t' Big Joe San'wich guy, an' out t'plant we wen' awn strike. An', well, I din' wanneh to go an' -- you know, go pushin' nobody awff t' subway platfawrm a' nut'n, so I t'ought if I preten'ed t'at Siddy was a wil' man, y'see, it might get'teh min' awff 'eh troubles. Um, y'see?" The Magistrate takes a puff of his cigarette and leans back in his chair. "You are," he sighs, "a remarkable woman, Mrs. Krause." "I am?" whispers Alice....)
("I wantcha t'come t'woik wit' me t'marra," requests Sally. "Leonoreh! I said I wantcha t'come t'woik wit' me t'marra." Leonora narrows her eyes and tilts her head to favor her good ear. "How much," she scowls. "What?" puzzles Sally. "How much," repeats Leonora, "I gonna get?" "What??" reiterates Sally. "How MUCH?" insists Leonora. "I ain' woikin' f' free." "No," dismisses Sally. "I wancha t'meet a man." "I don' need to' meet no man," rejects Leonora. "I got 'nuff trouble." "Hmmm," hmms Sally. "Y'seem t' heeh t'em soap operas good enough." "What?" "Nut'n...")
("Look," insists Rosa. "Clawrk Gable. Whatcha say we go oveh t' City, take t'at in? "Clawrk Gable," sneers Bink. "I'm offa any man wit' eehs.")
("That's not funny." -- Butch)
(Curt Davis is 41, "it says here." Ha ha.)
(The dismal science.)
("Hmmmm." -- T. Manville.)
(Wait, does an out-of-town reporter even have jurisdiction here?)
("Who do you think I am, JANE ARDEN?")
(Aw, he just wants to play.)


